Tuesday, 5 February 2008

Getting on with things

It's been a long while but i thought i ought to have a go.

Thanks to those who e-mailed asking how i was and apologises to those i forgot to get back to.

What's been happening.  Well, my sister and daughter went to the chapel of rest to see Mum, i sat in the office with my g'kids.  Somehow they decided Mum had lost her legs.  Exactly where they thought they had gone i don't know.  The lady behind the desk assured us they only take them off if they are wooden.  I went and found them, then my sister asked well where is her foot then.  My response was, 'on the end of her leg, where do think'.  Foot was duly found where i said it would be.  By now we couldn't really stop laughing and it was a good thing that there was  no one else visiting a loved one or they would of wondered what was going on.

My sister put a plastic bag in the coffin ( cos Mum was always rattling one at inappropriate moments) and a newspaper and pencil with rubber so she could do the crossword she loved.  Youngest g'kids wanted to go and say goodbye so after a lot of thought it was decided to take them and we would only find out if it was the right thing to do after the event. 

I was given the job of taking them in although my daughter decided to stay as well.  Anyway, they had brought pictures and cards to put in as well and duly added them to carrier bag and paper etc. when suddenly g'son (8yrs) whips out the camera and says can i take a photo now.  Well you should have seen our faces.  Before we could get our heads round it g'daughter took two photos for him as he wasn't tall enough to get good shots. Then away went the camera.

Daughter decided to take them off of his camera and has them in a folder on the pooter.  It would be too tempting for an eight year old not too use them in the future either for monetary gain or horror factor.

The kids handled it very well and it was the best thingwe could do.  It certinly taught them about the circle of life and when the funeral came round they decided that was the boring bit and the get together afterwards and they wouldn't bother with that bit again.  They said goodby to their great grandmother and moved on.

The undertaker walked the whole way in front of the hearse from the house to the church, walking straight through the red traffic light.  We was nearly taking bets on when they would stop and he would get in,  but he never did.  He said, 'well it's a nice day and we were a bit early.'

Mum would have loved being the centre of attention and knowing she stopped all the traffic up the High Street.  She would have seen the funny side of it all.

Since then we have tackled the Probate Form and are waiting for their appoinment for us to go and get probate and then we sell the house.

We have a stairlift to get rid of but nobody wants.  She only had it for 3 weeks and it would be a real waste to throw it away.

Soon we will be having a go at emptying the loft which will probably mean more stuff ending up at my house.  My back room is already full of things that are too good to chuck or have family memories.

Ah well soon it will be all over then it's the end of an era and as someone pointed out i now have become the head of the family.  Help i'm not old enough yet.

 

Jenny <><

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

So sorry you lost your Mum ,You sometimes get by because of the hysterical laughter at times like this ,and Im the oldest in my family now too ..love Jan xx

Anonymous said...

I feel the same way as I'm now the oldest of my family.  I'm really still the same me and haven't found much difference.  I'm sorry for your loss and for all that goes with it.  'On Ya' - ma

Anonymous said...

Hi Jenny I am happy you are posting again and updating us.It's good to know everything went well for you and that things are finally moving and getting sorted out.Once thats done it's a lot off your mind . I am the opposite to you..I am the youngest memeber left in my family and sometimes  it frightens me.I always thing I hope I am not the last to be left alone.I am lonely enough to start with.You look after yourself know you are in my thoughts and thankyou for the lid words you have sent me too.Much appreciated always.Take Care God Bless Kath astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

Anonymous said...

Welcome back, Jenny, I'm right pleased you're back on post. It sounds, strangely enough, as if the funeral was made more bareable through the down-to-earth attitude of the youngsters.

Best wishes,
Guido

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you decided to post today!  Sending you big hugs.
Missie

Anonymous said...

Thanks for leaving a comment in my journal Jenny.
I see that you lost your mum over Christmas.  What a sad time that must have been for all of you.  
I'm sorry not to have been around to offer you my condolences.  I don't think I had the time to be on line then.  I lost my brother on New Years Eve so we both got a punch in the solar plexus over the holidays....didn't we?
You and your family seemed to have the right attitude towards everything that should happen at her funeral.  As it should be too.
I don't envy you the task of sorting everything out.  That will be a nightmare.
Stay well and happy.
Jeanie xxxx

http://journals.aol.co.uk/kirkbyj05/DaytoDayLifeintheLakes

Anonymous said...

Lovely entry and so pleased to hear it was a sort of happy event with the laughter. Mum passed just 3 days before her 80th so all her birthday cards were in with her and the essential lipstick so she was ready to meet Dad who was waiting for her. We still have our loft full of things that were Mum and Dads, can't bear to part with a lot of it even now 7 & 10yrs down the line respectively.

Anonymous said...

Jenny, I'm glad you're here now- You know, I kind of would like your family at my funeral when it's time- you all have my kind of humor!  (Must be inherited from my grandpa who was born and raised in England before moving to Canada~)  I used to wonder when it's appropriate for certain age kids to go to a funeral, but I think when they knew and loved the person, it's a good chance to have closure.  I know I missed so much not being able to say goodby to my Grandpa- he was in the hospital a long time before he passed away, and I was only about 8 so couldn't go see him.  I was blessed to see off my Nana though- my son I imagine will go to see off any relatives that pass before we do, as we live with farm animals and he's been raised knowing the circle of life and death.  I know it's not the same with animals, but he knows that we'll get to see each other again someday, and that our pets are enjoying each others company in animal heaven now.  God Bess you and your family Jenny.  I hope the probate and business end of this goes smoothly for you.  You're in my thoughts and prayers.  Carolyn

Anonymous said...

Hi glad to see you back realy missed your entries. When my dad passed I put his pipe in with him as he was never without it. Love Joan.

Anonymous said...

I have old photos of a few of my aunts laying in their coffins.   Who actually took them or why exactly I don't know.  But I'm sure they were motivated out of love and a hope to remember.  (((Jenny))) -  Barbara

Anonymous said...

 first  time  i  seen  your journal           my  deepest  sympathies  to  you.   im  carer  for  my  mum                    dont  know  what  i  will  do  when  she  goes.       take  care             mort  xx